A Thursday with Maury and Humility is Good

I am part of a small and exclusive fraternity--people who have been diagnosed with base of tongue cancer. Many individuals have been helpful to us concerning our journey particularly those suffering similar types of neck cancers such as throat and tonsilar. Most notably Coach Don Patterson who has been there for me locally every step of the way.

There is, however, one person I've connected with who has survived base of tongue cancer including a cancerous lymph node. Eldon and Maureen Hare, long-time Macomb residents, heard through a mutual friend about my diagnosis and hooked us up with Maury and Sandi Coats who currently live on 34-foot boat but previously called Austin, TX, their home. As it turns out, Maury is the son of a famous Macomb barber, grew up in Macomb, and graduated from Western Illinois University in 1959.

Prior to meeting Maury and Sandi last week, all I knew is that he had survived base of tongue cancer for 3 years and was doing quite well. We initially communicated via email and phone calls until the Coats made a trip to Macomb to visit the Hares and kindly consented to meet with Diane and me.

We spent about two hours at 35 Indian Trail as Diane and I queried Maury and Sandi about every phase of their cancer journey. It was wonderful to sit there talking to someone who had literally walked in my shoes. Shared experiences eased our anxieties and at the end of the visit, I asked Maury what advice he had for me. He quickly responded, "one word, Gordy, PATIENCE. It will take months and maybe a year before you resemble and feel like the man you did before your diagnosis." For Diane and me it was almost a spiritual experience and we are much appreciative to Maury and Sandi and Eldon and Maureen.

As for humility, life sometimes surprises us in ways we never expect and these can be both serious or light and humorous. I had one of the latter with Maury. Due to my professional background, I tend to begin conversations asking people where they are from, where they went to school, and a bit about their family. I did just this with Maury. Now I must be candid here. I would be less than truthful if I didn't admit that I enjoy a certain name recognition in Macomb because of my local-access interview TV show Across the Miles and Western's alumni constituency because of my teaching and alumni careers.

My photo appeared in the Western News for 28 years; I had a column that people read or so I thought. As we sat in our family room, Maury revealed that, as mentioned previously, he was a townie and a 1959 graduate of WIU. I was excited. These were Western's glory years in football and basketball and Maury and Eldon were in the pep band. Clearly, Maury already knew who I was and not just as a base of tongue compatriot but certainly as the "alumni guy." Now we had only been together for 5 minutes when all this happened. As soon as he mentioned he had graduated in 1959, I said, "well, then you know me." He replied, "never heard of you except through this shared experience." I said, "Maury, don't you get the Western News? Haven't you ever read my column or seen my photo?" He answered, "yes, I get it but I've never read it and never heard of you." I sat there incredulously with a shocked look on my face while Diane held her sides and laughed uncontrollably. It was a divine moment. A dose of humility is good for all of us.

The Taylors will forever be indebted and connected to Maury and Sandi Coats. Thanks for being there for us.